April 11, 2011

Blog Vacation...permanent?

I meant to take a little vacation from blog land. I said to myself, "Self, you need a brain vacation. Give yourself a month off and then come back strong!" But apparently that vacation is going to turn permanent.

I wish this was for me. I wish I could keep up with blogging. When I do it, I love it. But right now...it is not for me, so I'm not going to continue doing it.

I'll still be around in stalker comment form, and I'll see some of you on the FaceSpace. Everyone else - thanks for everything and keep up the good work!

Peace out,
J

March 8, 2011

Vacay

All,
I'm outta here for a bit! Off for some vacay! I could really use a beach, relaxation vacay, but we tend to take spring break trips not to someplace warm and sunny but to snowy mountains. So I'm off to tire myself out on the slopes and hopefully find zen in carved turns, tried muscles, hot tubs, and long naps in the car ride home.

Peace out,
Jen

March 7, 2011

Blog Land Love

Every once in a while, we get to be a part of something special. Sometimes, like in blog land, it is a sustained feeling in a community of people that truly amazes me. We found a place, on the internet, where people are mainly positive and supportive, where women are taking ownership of their lives and feelings, and where *knock on wood* the trolls have yet to come. Pretty neato!

Then blog land goes above and beyond, and I am again astounded. Here is the story:

We all watched the photography contest unfold over at The Thirty Something Bride, with all the crazy happenings, and then the sad, sad ending where our friends Sarah and Tony did not win and instead some....ok, nothing against the winners. Just me being biased!

But I was extremely biased. So much so that it surprised me. Why was I so sad about the outcome of a contest I was not even entered in with people who I have never even met? Because they deserved it. They really did. Read through their blog just a little bit and you'll see that they have some special going on; their story, their family, and Sarah's thoughtful writing all bring together this clear picture of people who truly deserved some wedding magic.

The contest may not have turned out how we hoped, but damned if we couldn't do something about it. I wrote a few e-mails, poked around, and sure enough a lot of people were also wanting to help. Not only that, but it turns out that Sarah and Tony also hired a wedding elf in Larissa of Larissa Cleveland Photography. After lots of e-mails flying around, a plan was hatched. Blog land was going to raise $500 for an additional hour to add to Sarah and Tony's photography package, and with that, Larissa would donate an additional hour of her time. Awesome!

I went to work, gathered up as many names/e-mails as I could, sent out some e-mails and started harassing kindly asking for money. It really didn't take much asking or harassing on my part at all. Blog land come through with style, and in little over a week we raised the $500 necessary! Go team!

So congratulations to Sarah and Tony - you have two additional hours on your photography package with Larissa! and congratulations blog land - you all just earned yourself some good karma!

Twenty seven people donated to this effort - some giving ten dollars, some giving fifty - and each little bit counted to getting us to our goal. Below is a list of all the lovely people (and their blog links) who contributed. (Well, almost all. One lovely lady declined to be named, stating that she would like the "nice fuzzy feeling without the recognition." I know who you are! and I recognize you!) I want to thank each and every one for contributing. I sent out some e-mails, but the generosity of the group is what got us to our goal! Many thanks go to (in random order):
We also can't forget Larissa and her contribution! Thank you for matching our contribution with a donated hour of your own! Thank you for being a wedding elf for a couple who deserves it!

To Sarah, Tony, Bean and Bug,
Keep with it because you must be doing something right. After following your story, a group of strangers came out of the woodwork to give you some wedding magic. We see that you have something special going on and want that to be celebrated as well as documented! We hope this gift of two additional hours goes toward keeping the memories of your wedding alive and well for many years.

Best Wishes,
Blog Land

February 25, 2011

This is not a mix - so far behind

Sometimes (ok, lots of the time) I feel like I am miles and miles behind. Like the rest of the world is out there dominating and I'm a total slacker and failing at everything imaginable. (downer much?) I see people excelling and want to do the same, but there is no one thing that I excel at or am 'talented' at. Nothing in particular pulls me in any one direction. Instead, I have an interest in lots of things and am mediocre at most of them.

Most of this is my fault. I've never pushed myself to excel and then, when I try something and it doesn't go magnificently, I'm very harsh on myself. Don't we all wish to have that secret talent just waiting to explode out in all its glory? To be able to stand out in something?

This spans both personally and professionally. I feel like I'm behind where I should be. Of course, that begs the question where should I be? And I don't know. I've been trying to set goals for myself, find a direction I want to go, but I'm not sure where it is that I'd like to be.

This all leads me to feel like I'm having a quarter life crisis.

Me and you both, buddy!

Identity, career, friends, being an adult - its all bearing down on me! And I'm totally lost as to what I should be doing. I played the game and did ok, but now I feel like the game has let me down or has suddenly changed the rules without warning.

I think this is a common feeling among people my age. We were told about all these possibilities in life, how we could be anything we wanted to be. We played the game put in front of us - did that whole college thing, graduated and.... and then what?; Some of us got jobs. Some of these jobs were in our hopeful field while some were not. And now we are all feeling a bit of 'now what' syndrome. Is this what adulthood is? I'm pretty sure I was expecting something else and something more.

NPR has had a series (but I guess that's the only one I could find...) discussing these topics - all of which help me feel that I am not alone. Also, I've seen lots of talk around blogland that confirms we are not alone. No matter how down I get, that is a very key and very helpful thing to remember - it is normal.

Sorry to be a downer today with no music mix and instead just sharing my midlife crisis. But it is what it is and that's what you are getting, capish? Capish.

Oh, and happy friday!

Slainte,
Jen

February 16, 2011

Staying Put

Our dream has always been to move out west. Out west to mountains where we can ski one run continuously for more than 30 seconds! (Fun fact for the day: Lindsay Vohn grew up in Minnesota and spent her early years skiing here. Buck Hill. True, that is the wimpiest of wimpy ski hills we have... but it doesn't get that much better!)

Brett wanted to move right after graduating college, but whoops! He met some total hottie freshman who was so awesome and funny and smart and wonderful (Hi!) that he couldn't leave! So he stayed here for me, the dream crusher.  Then, four years later, I was graduating college and we again want to move out west.  I happened to land a bomb job that fit exactly with my major/minor combo it was ridiculous!  But crap, its here in Minnesota. Just keep crushing that dream!

So we held on to the idea. Brett was between jobs for a while, then we decided to get married and knew we should be here for the wedding, then Brett got a job, and so on and so on. Was our dream ever going to happen? Maybe its not our dream after all? Maybe we just have to wait for better timing? Maybe, maybe, maybe!

For the last two years I've felt in limbo. Wanting to move, bad timing, whatever - we weren't committed to being here, but we hadn't fully committed to moving west either. We were always humming and hawing back and forth about what we should do, unsure of what would be the best decision.  Limbo.

Well, we've decided to stay. Things are really great for us right here at this moment and there is so much that we can be doing and learning in our current jobs. Plus, we have those current jobs! For Brett, after just coming off partial unemployment, he is not anxious to go back to that in a new state.

So here we stay.

And I'm trying really hard to not look at that as a failure. To not feel disappointed. Instead, I want to focus on the opportunities we can make for ourselves here and how staying put is allowing us some more vacation opportunities this spring and summer.  *positive thoughts*

One friend of mine, who moved from Minnesota to Denver to Seattle told me, "I love coming home to see you guys, but if I stay for too long I start to miss it, so I try to keep my visits quick. If I moved home now, I'd feel like a failure."

Um.. 1) I'm still here and I didn't think I was a failure, so thanks?  2)  Whats with that? Why is the distance you move from home seen as a measure of success? Why can't we be successful and be living in our own home town? Is this a generational thing?

Either way, I'm trying to remain positive. Sure, its easiest to move when you are young and fresh out of school, but that doesn't mean we can't move later, right? We can do what works best for us now, and hope that sometime in the future moving will also work for us.

Right?  I'm hoping you all have positive words here to help feed my positive thoughts!

Peace all,
Jen

February 10, 2011

Kitties!!!

Blog land and cats seem to go hand in hand. Also, being awesome and beautiful, but that's besides the point. Cats. We have them. Want to meet them?

The first kitty we got is named Neko. Affectionately nicknamed Meow Meow, Fatso, Chub Chub, Chubba Wubba, Big One, or Kitty. She likes to eat (lots) and cuddle. Her favorite toys include a catnip mouse and string to pounce. Neko is a very vocal kitty who will spend hours watching out the window and chattering at birds. Neko likes boxes but sometimes can't quite fit into them...

:(  All boxes are many too small boxes for Neko
Um, and now I feel bad because that is the only picture I have access to of Neko at the moment!  Sorry, kitty!  She doesn't always look like a complete blob...

North is the second kitty we got when we decided that Neko would benefit from having a friend around. They do not get along. North's nicknames include Northington, Meow Meow, Little One, Child, and F*ing Cute Kitty! North's interests include being cute, prancing, finding trouble, and peeing on our bed when angry. His favorite toys include twisty ties and Neko. He would love to sleep on my face if I would let him.

North as a baby.  Gah!  That face just kills me!
North all growed up and looking quite handsome

I love them, my Big and Little Ones.  But through the experience of having cats have found out that I am still a dog person.

February 4, 2011